Dear Chantal, It’s been a year since my divorce and I’m starting to feel like I might be ready to start dating.I’ll be honest, it was not an easy divorce by any means and it’s still difficult at times.” If this is the question you are asking, here is the response I give most often when asked the question by recently divorced men and women who are thinking about jumping back into the dating pool.If you are asking whether or not it’s too soon to date after divorce the answer probably is, “Yes, it’s too soon to date after divorce.” But how can you know for sure?
I’m feeling like I want to move into the next chapter of my life and not stay stuck in my past.
Anita Dear Anita, When it comes to dating after losing a relationship to divorce or death there is one major question to ask yourself before hitting the dating scene.
Will I infect my next relationship with negativity? And most importantly of all, how much do you trust YOURSELF?
“Even very reasonable and civilized people can find unexpected, hard-to-manage emotions popping up at the most inconvenient times, particularly during the early months of a separation and divorce,” caution divorce experts Pauline Tesler and Peggy Thompson in their book, .
“Recovering from the shock of a failed marriage involves moving through that initial period of diminished capacity, until gradually, more and more of the time, your pre-divorce ‘best self’ is back at the helm.” For most people, this Once you do feel ready to date again, do yourself a favor and read this spot-on blog article called “Low-stakes First Dates,” which says that the key to avoiding a tangled web of confusion and dejection is to stop betting everything on the first date.